Confessions

I must confess...

Unless I confess, and admit that my life is not right, I would go on living a life without transformation...

"That I can be a hypocrite..." I wish I could be like Jesus, utterly perfect and totally faithful to his word, but I am not. I believe in many things and do share them to people but it is not always that I live by them. It takes a single decision that is outside the will of God to prove oneself a hypocrite. "Why do you call me ‘Lord, Lord’ and do not do what I say?." (Luke 6:46)

Most of the time we know what God is saying. Quite as often as we do, we play deaf, and even ask, "Lord, what do you want me to do?" Simple actually, what He says is "Glorify my name". A life lived by faith. A life in complete surrender.

An enthusiast on her first job

Its been a while since I last blogged. Probably coz I enjoyed my private journals and that mostly I felt only I could relate to them. That is, I felt. There are many reasons for blogging that I don't want to associate myself with, usually because its true. But now I just want to go back and share what's up with my life.

It is a new season. I just graduated and I started working last June 1. A newbie, i fit the enthusiast stereo-type at the moment. I look forward to each endeavor I am tasked with. I encourage myself to give nothing but my best as much as I can, and I aspire for going beyond what's expected. The environment is peaceful yet challenging. I feel like I enjoy each moment.

But of course, I don't. There would be times when I would get discouraged. Times when I question whether I have what it takes. Those times I am afterwards surprisingly encouraged because I know that that is far from what God is telling me. In fact, I believe them to be lies from the enemy. I love (as much I would not want to write it-for lack of a better term) my job. Being in Corporate Planning is in itself a blessing and an opportunity. I thank God for this gift he has prepared in advance for me. He has worked out everything even before I knew it. Much too long a story to write. It wasn't exactly my dream but He knew better. He knows better. In fact, He knows best!

Immersion: Remembrance to Inspiration

Overwhelmed with the immersion experience, i was compelled to write in the midst of our processing session... I am grateful for every experience, every encounter which He prepared in advance for me. There are no accidents.

Its funny how young people like to remember things. Pictures, autographs, letters, remembrances (I was once a fan of such)...makes me think about how I myself would want to remember. I came to a few moments in my life when I thought that such which remind me of the past were but add-ons to my already crammed drawers. Although I do have those times when I am just happy remembering times from the past, I am not the type who would intentionally want to remember. Life goes on right? But it struck me that it is good to remember and be inspired, that it is good to not forget, and make every intention to do so. To what it is that I ought to remember, God's wisdom guides me. It is good to remember.

Let it be

So far, i have been successful in keeping the habit. Yey. Here's a short post from my journal. I wrote it early this morning :-) Here goes:

Let not my reason be anything other than God. Let it not be wealth, nor reputation, nor vindication, nor power, nor vengeance. Let it not be a product of my circumstances, but a product what I have experienced in God. Let it not be to impress anybody but God. Let it be God. If it is not, then I rebuke myself out of love. God is the only reason, and He is enough. He is worth living for. To honor Him in every way would be the best for my life. I will remember :)

Choice/Will/Right

I wasn't able to keep my promise to myself to update my blog at least once a month... Anyway, I am to start over and continue to blog as often as I could. A New Year's Post...I actually wrote this the past month I think...

Choice. Every person has some extent of freedom. While it can be very limited for others because of socio-economic, political and cultural factors, we are able acknowledge a huge part in which we are able to make our own choices and decisions.

For a person like me who claims to be a Christian (surrendered my life to Jesus, made Him Lord and Savior of my life), it ought to be limited to His will. That is, if I really did submit my life to Him, then it is no longer I who lives but Christ in me (Galatians 2:20). Is it like "I do not make my own decisions, Jesus does"?

Yes, in that what Jesus would do - what is according to the will of My Father -

IS my decision i.e. what I would do, exceedingly so that there is no other possible

outcome but to have done it.

No, in that I do have what is commonly referred to as human free will. I do have the

capability to make my own decisions.

It is just that ever since I submitted my life to Him, I no longer want to acknowledge my will, but always look to His will (which is not necessarily contrary to my will or passions). Insisting on my will simply gives more room, which is mistaken as freedom, for sin to enter in my life. I do have the capability to make my own decisions, but now my decisions are not my own because I have surrendered them when I gave my life to Him. Another way to put it: At Calvary, I lost my right to devise my own plans and pursue my own agendas.